Monday, April 9, 2012

ME FIRST.....................................

"It's All About Me"

Here is a photo of a recent painting I purchased from a wonderful artist.  Of course I loved the composition and am over the moon thrilled with the colors.

Anyway.....thought this was an appropriate photo to share with this post.

Here goes.......

I believe a lot of women are raised to put their needs last.  I know I was.

I have spent a good portion of my life ignoring my needs while putting everyone else's ahead of mine.

With age....comes wisdom....if one is lucky. You learn to listen to your body and pay attention to your needs.   Putting yourself first does not mean you are selfish...but always taking care of yourself last could mean you are selfless.

I'm constantly trying to strike a balance  between caring for myself and caring for others.  Often....this is not an easy task....but one I know I must master if I am to live my own AUTHENTIC LIFE.

I don't want to end my life knowing I have hitched my wagon to someone else's star.

Any thoughts on this?

hugs from here......still busy, busy with Skyler......




  1. Jo, you are so right! If you're not taking care of yourself, who can you take care of properly? I have no problem taking time for myself and doing something I want to do. It makes me happy and not resentful when I need to help someone else.

  2. Your new purchased painting is joyful and fits your words well.

  3. Much like you, I spent most of my life taking care of everyone else's needs and not taking care of myself. Today, in my personal life I take time for me. I 'absolutely need' this 'me time' as my job totally drains me.

  4. what a beautiful painting, thats one sassy looking woman, she looks like she has all her stuff togther.Its so true, we do need to care for ourselves, I'm 55 years old and I think I really have just started to learn how to take care of my self in the last 10 years, but its never to late.

  5. Love your painting, so vibrant. I'm sending you an e-mail

  6. Jo-You sound so much like me. I have lived my whole life for others- wife-wise, work-wise, mother-wise, grandkid-wise. It is hard for me to do something for myself without feeling guilty and I DO struggle with that. Even sitting here spending time on the computer (which I love) makes me feel guilty. I think it is the generation that I was raised in..a young child in the mid-50's coming of age in the 60's. I am trying to learn to do things just for me~ xo Diana

  7. It's great that you've looked ahead to realize you need to live your own life as well as do things for others. :)

  8. Don't you love it
    when a piece of art
    speaks to you?

    I have been a pleaser
    all of my life, but in
    my 40's I learned to
    balance it a bit better.
    Hoping to perfect that
    in my next decade : )

    xx Suzanne

  9. Yes Jo, I too lived my life for was part and parcel of our conditioning. Today tho, it is me first cause if Momma ain't happy nobody is, lol.

    Your painting is vibrant and full of the stuff of life and it does scream...Me First!

    Cascading Blessings!

  10. i love your painting and admire the honesty
    of your sentiments. you first!

  11. First thoughts are how to copy the painting picture and frame it:) I know, I know. But I LOVE it! On to the rest of the story. Yes, we both know how to be on the back burner and take care of others. I think most (?) women our age are like that. But you're right, it's now our time, yet it's in our nature to be mother hens :) But as I've said on posts lately...I plan to slide on into Heaven all used up! So from now on, It's me, me, me! And you you you! xoxoxo Great post too:)

  12. I found your blog via Privet and Holly! Your blog is so lovely and I love this post! I am in my mid 50's and learning to lead my own authentic life! I look forward to reading more of your posts!

  13. I love this post. This has always been a problem for me too. It's hard to find the balance. When I was 36 I got MS and suddenly I had to slow down and start thinking about my needs a bit, but I sometimes still feel bad when I can't do all I want to do for my family. I think it has been good for my kids though. They have had to learn to do things for themselves which is something we all need to be able to do. I wasn't doing them any real favors by doing everything for them. I love your painting!

  14. Dear Jo, it seems to be a theme here..many of us feel guilty for simply taking some time for ourselves! I too have it, although my husband is very selfless too. He gives and gives for our kids and grandkids, with rarely ever a thank you, or a nice gesture for him. We have decided to change that recently, and start living for our happiness instead of ensuring the security and happiness of others. We aren't as young as we once were, and want to enjoy our life together.

  15. Good Morning Josette ~~ The painting is amazing, I do love the composition... It's quite different.
    Ah! The deprogramming of it all. My older sister's generation were hit hardest with the placing yourself last syndrome. The funny thing is she was just talking to me about this very subject last week. :)

  16. That truly is an amazing picture/painting. I love it.
    Yes...I think it is often time a Womens nature, to put herself last. Always wanting to see to the "success" of others, especially our children. I would put everything aside from ME. for the well being of my children.
    but sometimes, that is why mom's do. Not necessarily right or wrong.
    I do believe, in order to BEST give of ourselves, we need to BUILD ourselves....but some times that gets lost.
    at 60....I am growing
    and yes, EVEN NOW, developing
    I sacraficed for my children and others.............yet now, I can feel GOOD about learning about ME.

  17. we need to whisper this is our daughter's and granddaughter's ears......timely, relevant, a news flash to heard round the world.

    thank you.

  18. I could not agree more. I am happy to help anyone, but only on the conditions that any results mean that I am still the most important person to me. I have no children of my own, maybe if I did I would think differently where they were concerned. There was elderly family to think of when we moved to France, but we decided that being over 60 ourselves, it was time we did what we wanted to do. We are in fact only a couple of hours away by air if there is a major problem. Diane

  19. Bravo...I love what you have to say....a balance is essential! I loved browsing today and have signed up to follow along....

  20. I was actually having this exact conversation with my husband yesterday. My life has been much like yours, always taking care of others and putting myself last. It seems this last leg of my life is suppose to be focused on me. Great post my friend!

  21. I know exactly what you mean. I always put myself last my whole life until I made myself literally sick and in much pain. It took a few years to figure out, but I'm 62 now and I can say for the last 12 years I have been putting myself as close to first as possible. Seriously, I really make time for myself. Family didn't like it at first because change is always hard. I agree, it doesn't mean you are selfish in a bad way, it means you love yourself enough to treat you well. I feel so much better now.

  22. ohhh don't get me going with this one, Every day I dialogue in my mind how women have been so entrained through so many means, they don't even know what is like to love...THEMSELVES....this the greatest tragedy on Earth. We give ourselves away caring for others, but imbalances would not take place if we knew our own personal needs to begin with. Lady


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