I have never lived alone....although I have a few lady friends that do.
This morning my wonderful soul mate had an early meeting. That meant I was here alone with my pups for a good part of the early morning.
I tried to imagine my life without Brad....it was unsettling to say the least.
As we grow older together it is inevitable that one of us will end up being alone. I'm not trying to be morbid here but just addressing reality.
You build a life with someone and suddenly you are the one who remains.
I don't really know what a person can do to prepare for this.....but it will happen in each of our lives if we have a partner. How do you adapt to doing everything ALONE that you once did with someone else. It really is almost overwhelming to think about it.
So.....for the time being....I just treasure each day that I have with my partner and I know he does the same with me.
You know.....when you are young you never think about this....but as you age together.....it becomes more of a reality.
Just me thinking out loud today.
As I said.....not trying to be morbid just speaking the truth.
xo
You're not being morbid at all. It's the most real of all facts that we're all mortal. I try to be grateful for my husband, family, dogs, you name it, everyday...
ReplyDeleteIt is something that many think of now and then, especially when health issues come into play.
ReplyDeleteI have known many widows, both straight and lesbian, who have struggled with this. And it's more often an issue for women because of our longer life spans.
ReplyDeleteDear Jo,
ReplyDeleteNothing morbid about this touching post.
I have lived alone for more than 17 years.
My ex husband and friend died 2 years ago.. and that was a big blow.
No one really can prepare you for what is to come.. Just keep strong and enjoy today. That is what i learnt to do. Made my own little routine .. its not easy.
Do as much as you can together..
love ..valxxx
It is difficult to contemplate being alone. My sister is widowed. She has had a very hard time and it has been five years! If it were me, I hope I do better, but I don't want to think of it.
ReplyDeleteDebbie
This is something I am learning to live with after losing my dear husband 28 months ago. I had never lived alone and let me tell you it takes some getting used to. The 'widow's fog' has finally lifted for me, the grief isn't as raw as in the beginning, but the 'missing' him does not abate. It is an every day thing, some days the missing is worse than others. For every widow or widower it is different, as we are all individuals.
ReplyDeleteWe were married for 43 years. I do feel his love and encouragement though, all around me as I still live in our same little cottage/compound that we came to in 1973. It is my haven from the crazy world that we live in.
We will be reunited again one day, until then, I wish to age gracefully and I thank God for the gift of each new day. He is my strength when I am weak, He sends blessings my way too.
It's not morbid to think on these things, it's part of life. Nothing can prepare you for your loss though, it's something you have to go through, and hopefully grow through, becoming a stronger person.
FlowerLady
I don't think it is morbid, at all. So many of my friends have lost their husband in the past years. I know I will not like living alone, having had a taste of it when my husband and I had a long-distance marriage for five years. It's those little things that you miss, like talking the day over or when something goes wrong with the house or car and you have to deal with contractors and mechanics. I think the best thing to do is to get yourself a handyman if your husband goes first, but hopefully that will not for a very long time. Thank you for your kind words!
ReplyDeleteJane
Jo, I don't think you are being morbid just realistic.It's smart to prepare, if only in your mind, for uncertainity. I often think of this as my hubby and I are both the same age and you have to know that something could happen at any time and what if? Thank heavens we are both in good health so am not preparing for anything to happen tomorrow, but my sister, who is 5 years younger than I, lost her husband and she was a very dependent person but she is managing beautifully. As I'm writing, I see your pretty little pink sign to my right and those are such fitting words for any occasion..Happy Thursday..Judy
ReplyDeleteDearest Jo, I think this is something that as we get older we begin to ponder more and more. Unlike you, I have had off and on bouts with living alone. Even though I am married, my husband still goes to work every day so I am alone for 8 hours of the day 5 days of the week. It was an adjustment when I first started staying home...but given time, I've adapted to the new norm. However, when my mom passed, I really began thinking about the what happens when that time comes when one of us is left here without the other. Very distressing to think about. Like you, I am enjoying the time we have together...knowing all too well that eventually it will only be one. Big hugs..xoxo
ReplyDeleteNo, your post is not morbid at all. I lost Jim over ten years ago and
ReplyDeleteit is a devastating loss by all means, but, little by little you adjust and
learn to fill your life with new things. I threw myself into work after he
was gone and that filled much of my life at the time. I lived for years
alone until recently when I moved in with my Son. Now that has become
an adjustment also. Learning to live with someone once again.
My wish for you is that you do not have to face that happening and
that you enjoy many years to come with the man you love.
hugs and blessings
Sharon
xoxoxox
I can't imagine I've been divorced for a while now years actually.. so around six years single.. I often think I'm going to pass alone... I have children but you kno it's not the same. I got really close to my Mom in the last four years she became ill and I took care of her.. I feel empty and lost most of the time but I just try to move on each day.. but her being my best friend it's been hard it's been a year and it doesn't seem any easier though everyone says in time.. I tried to prepare for her death but never seemed to have the time and honestly I still feel I haven't even had time to grieve over it.. Friends from church helped alot.. with love Janice p.s. don't believe there's a way to prepare for losing someone. It still hurts no matter.. But God can help..
ReplyDelete