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HI AGAIN......I'M HERE WITH MY LESSON IN TOW............


If I slow down long enough....and REALLY pay attention....I can usually figure out where I have missed the mark.
I've visited with a few friends...and listened to their input...which I value greatly...their open sharing always seems to make the load a little lighter.

Anyone who has followed me for any length of time knows of the addiction problems that have troubled my family for generations.  This disease can stay in families for generations and one can certainly become worn out fighting the battle.

My sweet husband and I are no exception.  In fact, our tendency is just to want to ignore the problem, get them out of jams, ignore their hurt and ILLNESS and carry on with OUR LIFE.  It does not mean we don't care....it just means that we are so uncomfortable with the situation and so very tired of having to deal with it.  Well.....we are still in the middle of the mess.....however....with a change in tactics.....I hope we can see some light at the end of the tunnel.

We  are determined to stay put and LISTEN........REALLY LISTEN....to them. We will no longer  tell them it is their problem...not ours....IT IS OUR PROBLEM......  Don't get me wrong....we cannot make anyone stop their destructive behavior..but we can love them and stand by them without judging them.....no matter what the outcome.

Thus the title of this post....."You can run.....but you cannot hide."  This disease is in my family.....it is here to stay.......but I am ready to look it straight in the eye....and do what is necessary to keep my serenity and hopefully give that same gift to those I love.

That does not mean giving up my life to save theirs....nor does it mean I have huge expectations....but it does mean that I will truly love them as they are
warts and all....even when it hurts.....ESPECIALLY when it hurts.

Thanks for letting me share today..

xo

Jo


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Comments

  1. Mary Sullivan FrasierJanuary 10, 2012 at 8:27 AM

    Jo~ I'm so glad that you have such a loving support system in your life. It's probably THE most important thing we can have on our side as women and especially as the loved one of someone who struggles with addiction and/or alcoholism.

    I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers and sending my very best wishes for strength, peace of mind and most of all love.

    Blessings,
    Mary (Mrs B)

    ReplyDelete
  2. SushJanuary 10, 2012 at 12:42 PM

    Love is never easy is it? Warts and all you are a dear family member to those in need.
    Hugs~

    ReplyDelete
  3. Vicki/JakeJanuary 10, 2012 at 2:52 PM

    Wise words Jo, love them while you can. Just remember to take care of yourselves too. This sickness can tear you apart. My love and thoughts are with you....

    ReplyDelete
  4. ChristelJanuary 10, 2012 at 3:45 PM

    I was raised with alcoholic parents, and know the struggles addiction brings. My prayers are with you, and your husband Jo. Stay strong, and fight the good fight! There truly is light at the end of the tunnel. xoxo Christel

    ReplyDelete
  5. It's Just DottieJanuary 10, 2012 at 6:22 PM

    I love you!!!
    Dottie

    ReplyDelete
  6. NanaDianaJanuary 10, 2012 at 7:08 PM

    Blessings, Jo! I feel your pain..it just makes one feel so helpless to not be able to do anything except listen and love- xo Diana

    ReplyDelete
  7. wendyJanuary 10, 2012 at 8:28 PM

    heartfelt
    and a tender subject for me, as this was the very thing that took my sons life.
    sucks

    ReplyDelete
  8. JanetteJanuary 10, 2012 at 9:16 PM

    Tough stuff. Our family is struggling with the younger generation's addictions. We are hoping, hoping, that they will be able to break the cycle that we were unable to do.
    Listening.
    That is a key.
    And accepting
    that we passed those genes along.

    ReplyDelete
  9. VictoriaJanuary 11, 2012 at 4:24 AM

    Shine on Jo..you are awesome..your post was powerful..keep shining..I loved all thta you said!
    HUgs
    Victoria

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sue G.January 11, 2012 at 5:42 AM

    Jo, it sounds like you are taking the right approach. Help where you can, but remember to keep your life intact. I have learned that every family has problems, and no one is immune to it. It helps me to not feel so alone when something happens in my family.

    ReplyDelete
  11. LuLu KelloggJanuary 11, 2012 at 12:14 PM

    {{{{{Jo}}}}}} Sending you a HUGE hug!!

    Love,
    LuLu~*xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  12. HeatherJanuary 11, 2012 at 1:01 PM

    Hi, my name is Heather! Please email me when you can, I have a question about your blog!

    HeatherVonSJ[at]gmail[dot]com

    ReplyDelete
  13. La Petite GalleryJanuary 12, 2012 at 2:39 PM

    Josette, I was glad I stopped in. I have that problem also. I have given so much time and money in the past and they just won't head my advice. OPPPs in trouble again. I am doing just what you do --Listen, but no more advice they don't want it.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousJanuary 13, 2012 at 6:55 PM

    Great message here sweet Jo! Big hugs to you my friend! xo

    ReplyDelete

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