Have you ever had a request from someone and been torn as to whether you should help them....or not?
This morning it happened to me in regards to my beautiful grandson.....I was asked to keep him all weekend and give up plans of ours that had been made for several months...because of conflicting schedules and illness..we have been unable to get together with these friends..who, by the way, are like family.
I explained the situation to the person requesting the favor and felt guilty the whole time. The situation is quite serious on the requestor's end....and it was all I could do to say no, I'm sorry I can't do this. You also must understand that we are VERY available to take care of our grandson most of the time.
When I discussed the situation with my wonderful soul mate....his reply was quite simple.....Jo, you can't take care of everyone......keep the focus on our life and let others take care of their own.
Such a simple concept....but at times so very hard to follow.
Hugs,
Jo
Such a simple concept....but at times so very hard to follow.
Hugs,
p.s. I know photo has no relevance...but I just liked it. I found it on the net somewhere.
Your partner is very wise.
ReplyDeleteYes, so very hard. I have been in that situation and if I chose to go with my wants, I felt so guilty. However, your love is correct. We have earned time for ourselves.
ReplyDeleteYou soul mate is right! It took losing TJ for me to learn that it is OK to say "no" to others. Over 3 years later I have gotten pretty good at it....almost too good at times..lol
ReplyDeleteI say YES ....I know, but the memories are carried in our family. Sorry, we all come from different places...This is a difficult choice and I have 3 grandsons so I can relate very well to your struggle.♥Debi
ReplyDeleteI think, unfortunately, us women have a harder time saying no when we need to-I think he is right when he says we can't take care of everyone but it is hard to remember sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI think the photo is stunning so thanks for that.
As a Grandmother I totally understand how the guilt thing comes to weigh on your mind Jo, but honestly, you have earned the right to live your own life now without feeling guilty about it. As you say, any other time you would have said yes, so don't give power to the person requesting this from you when your heart is telling you otherwise? It is alright to say no...I learned the hard way and ultimately so did my family...as I did a disservice to them by always saying yes. At some point they have to live their lives without depending on you to get them through. Your soul mate is right in this instance.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a marvelous time with your friends...
Blessings and Peace of Heart,
Akasa
sometimes you just have to say no, and don't feel guily about doing it. i am sure you could have taken him you would have, and they know that
ReplyDeleteIt is a beautiful photograph
ReplyDeleteand it is good advice.
It is not your job to take care of everyone,
although I often find myself in the same
predicament.
Now stop feeling guilty and smile.
hugs and blessings
Sharon
Saying no to family is difficult, especially when it has to do with a grand child, but your soul mate spoke wise words. I'm sure there will be other times you'll be able to help them out again. :) Carole
ReplyDeleteYou were very brave and correct in doing so. We have to remember the words your hubby said. We feel quilty about NOT giving up our lives for some one else...but why? Do we feel quilty to OURSELVES about giving up our lives for someone else?
ReplyDeletelove this picture!!!
ReplyDeleteI love the title of your post and your image. It is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI wish you the best with your family. It can be so hard to be loving but yet not say "yes" each time.
It sounds like you did really well.
Hugs,
Terri
Jo, being a Grandmother myself, I totally understand where you're coming from. xx
ReplyDeleteIt's very difficult to do what you did, but you did the right thing. Ultimately, we all have to make choices and some are hard. I hope the requester understood. I think everyone else does.
ReplyDelete